Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize
