I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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