Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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