oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
