Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
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