I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
