sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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