i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
