Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize
