I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
PANTIES FOUND
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
