Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
