He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Randomize
