It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
