Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
