if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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