I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
