i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
