thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Randomize
