I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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