i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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