my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
In the future we'll all be gay
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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