there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
