I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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