Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
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