goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I think my nap took me to another dimension
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
