i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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