I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
do herpes really smell.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
