My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
Randomize