No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
people are starting to question the shark bite story
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
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