Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
