Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
