It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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