so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Someone came in the potted fern
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize