sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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