Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
