Swine flu. Run for my life!
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Randomize
