it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
only you would photoshop your dick
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
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