That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
