halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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