the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
