The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Randomize
