Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Randomize
