; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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