I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
