Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize