Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
