How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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