It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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