Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Randomize
