I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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