I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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